Zandcwhite
Well-Known Member
- First Name
- Zach
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2019
- Threads
- 11
- Messages
- 8,299
- Reaction score
- 14,189
- Location
- Patterson, ca
- Vehicle(s)
- 2019 jlur
I think the entitlement came across from the ”they bought themselves toys”, “I had to sink myself into massive debt just to get a decent career”(categorically false, I’m on a jobsite with ~500 people and we all make six figures without going into debt. Skilled trades are great that way, especially for those of us who would have had to go into debt for college), and most importantly he “resents them for not helping him more”? God forbid your parents enjoy the fruits of THEIR labor? Odds are they likely spent on the kids, family activities, etc, but why cherish the memories when they could have paid for your education? I’m all for financial responsibility, saving for the future, and helping out your kids, but when they resent you for not giving them a hand out? I’d give my properties and investments to charity before giving an adult “child” with that mindset a damn dime.In GroovyGorilla's defense, many of my friends have had to support their parents (we are generally Gen X, our parents are generally Baby Boomers) because their parents could never stop buying stuff, had little in the way of financial discipline, or were incapable of saving for a rainy day or leaving behind something for their kids/grandkids. They were YOLO before it was a hashtag. I read GroovyGorilla's previous comment as more of "be responsible" and less "you should coddle your kid."
IMO there is nothing wrong with being financially responsible in case things don't go as planned. Saving money and helping family every now and then doesn't mean you are raising deadbeat kids. I am secure enough to admit that my parents paid for my college education. Does that mean I'm entitled? No. I work 70-80 hours a week and earn like crazy because (1) I am committed to prove they were right to bet on me, and (2) the social safety nets in the US may be on the cusp of unravelling and I want to be able to cover for them if something fails. I am doing the same with my kids, but I also expect them to work hard in return.
I know plenty of kids whose parents did nothing for them. Some of them developed a great work ethic. Some did not. Some are financially fit. Others are not. It's not a linear relationship. My experience also has led me to believe that hard work does not guarantee success. It doesn't hurt one's chances at success, but the world is also filled with hard working people who never make it. One look as an inflation-adjusted US wage curve over the past 30 years tells you that it is capital (i.e. savings, investments) that gets most of the rewards, not labor. It's not fair. But it's true.
Being financially responsible is easy. Google "Index Card Financial Plans" or Dave Ramsey's "Baby Steps". Once you achieve progress, have fun and live life. I'd also recommend John Bogle's Georgetown commencement address. The key takeaway: being rich isn't about X-salary or y-net worth, its about having something reckless spenders can't never have...."enough."
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