Jeep Wrangler Heaven and Hell

[TheBirdie72]

What are Jeeps like in Heaven vs. Hell? Below is my take… What’s yours?

In Heaven… Everyone drives the jeep of their dreams. They come new from the holy dealer fully customized, have unlimited gas mileage, tops are off with no bird issues, and they never ever get stuck. Everybody gives the whole-hand-out-the-window wave and everybody is happy! ?

In Hell… Everyone drives the jeep of their nightmares. They all have unfixable death wobble, the gas tanks leak, they only come in the color of rust, and you have to take them in for warranty service every day to which the devil tells you NO every time, repeatedly. And the jeep wave is a middle finger and spit in your general direction... ?

We live here on Earth, somewhere in between.

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[Heimkehr]

Heaven:
Touchscreens are verboten. This means every driver has their eyes on the road.

Hell:
Weekly, compulsory replacement of the ESS battery.

 

[TheBirdie72]

Getting ducked in Heaven (even the duck auto-deflates when done and puts itself away):

Getting ducked in Hell (happens 50x per day):

 

[rickinAZ]

What are Jeeps like in Heaven vs. Hell? Below is my take… What’s yours?

In Heaven… Everyone drives the jeep of their dreams. They come new from the holy dealer fully customized, have unlimited gas mileage, tops are off with no bird issues, and they never ever get stuck. Everybody gives the whole-hand-out-the-window wave and everybody is happy! ?

In Hell… Everyone drives the jeep of their nightmares. They all have unfixable death wobble, the gas tanks leak, they only come in pastel colors, and you have to take them in for warranty service every day to which the devil tells you NO every time, repeatedly. And the jeep wave is a middle finger and spit in your general direction... ?

We live here on Earth, somewhere in between.

Totally agree - except the pastel colors. IMO, only three vehicles can pull off pastel colors with panache: Wranglers, 911s, and Mini Coopers.

 

[TheBirdie72]

Totally agree - except the pastel colors. IMO, only three vehicles can pull off pastel colors with panache: Wranglers, 911s, and Mini Coopers.

Valid point. I fixed the original post. ?

 

[XJfanatic]

Your version of hell sounds like my Jeep adventures of high school and college. I loved that xj and it’s built in anti theft systems ??

 

[aldo98229]

In heaven, we all drive a Jeep.

In hell, we all drive a Ford Bronco.

 

[BroncoHound]

Heaven - a manual transmission found behind a powerplant with satisfactory power to move the vehicle in all its intended purposes.

Hell - no more Jeeps.

 

[txj2go]

In heaven, we all drive a Jeep.
In hell, we all drive a Ford Bronco.

I always thought Hell would be worse. I envisioned driving a Corolla or Camry or Hyundai or some POS like that.

 

[TheBirdie72]

I always thought Hell would be worse. I envisioned driving a Corolla or Camry or Hyundai or some POS like that.

Yes. But in hell, all of the broncos are low riders with no off-road capability, have only 2 gallon gas tanks, and smell like vomit on the inside.

 

[failsafe306]

Jeep Hell- grumpy grills and roof racks are mandatory.

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