Stupid Deer

Whaler27

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i dont know about your state but in CA theyre marked an endangered species so you cant touch them, even though theyre abundant and reproducing like feral hogs
Oregon, always the first to amplify and embrace a stupid idea, has implemented its solution! All criminals are considered victims and merit special protections. To help them we have increased all “services” (free food, meds, shelter, legal assistance, medical and dental care, and education support.) Then we decriminalized all drugs! Wooohooo! (Are we thinkers or what?) Now previously-criminal drugs are abundant, cheap, and available everywhere in the state, so we’re importing a stampede of every other state’s crackheads. (I‘m surprised there are any left in California…. seems like they’ve all moved here. ) Meanwhile, our local crackheads are also reproducing like feral hogs on meth, viagra, and steroids, but….wait for it… since drug possession and use are no longer “criminal”, the “crime rate“* is WAY down! See? Problem solved! :like: (* unless you count burglary, car theft, aggravated assault, rape, sex abuse, homicide, robbery, kidnapping, aggravated theft, sodomy, and gun crimes… but DRUG crime is WAY down!).

On the deer front, I’ve whacked a few. I think they are suicidal. They wait until the last moment, then leap into your path (or your jeep —it’s hard to time the leap properly to hit the side of a jeep at 50+ mph.). If you want a real butt-pucker, google “motorcycle deer strikes” and watch the videos. A friend of mine hit a deer at over 100 mph about twenty years ago. His sport-bike exploded the deer and he was knocked out. He had a bad concussion, some scrapes, and a sprained wrist but, miraculously, was otherwise uninjured. He was life-flighted to a trauma facility because he was unconscious and covered in blood and guts. The medics assumed it was much worse...

 
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Nitehawk92

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A couple years ago driving in NE Oregon through a canyon. Saw a deer cross the road in front of a pickup truck about a quarter mile in front of us. No one else in front of us. My beautiful and protective wife says, ‘SLOW DOWN’. I’m like what… but did sort of obey and slowed down some.

Then out of nowhere a couple of deer came from my right. Yep… a two deer pile up. First one hit my right front headlight, fender and the second one rear ended the first deer. Of course my wife was yelling at me as it was my fault (told you so) while I was laughing because the second deer rammed his (or her) head hard into the butt of the first one.

Dang though… because of covid and part shortages, my car was in the shop waiting for parts for almost two months! Did they get the last laugh? Somehow they walked away. So did we but we had a several thousand dollar repair bill mostly covered by insurance but dang!
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Heimkehr

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Shibadog

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Remember, this time of year the deer are in the rut-like teenage boys-One thing only on their mind. “Oh wow, a doe-gotta get to her.
 

Asuriyan

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we dont have to worry about the deer out here, though they do exist. we have to worry about the crackheads that run into the street and plow into your vehicle. at the least the deer dont do it on purpose and then yell theyre going to sue you.
I had my first accident at 17, driving my dad's car, on 38th St. in Indianapolis. I was proceeding through a left-turn arrow when a scruffy old redneck ran into my right fender, rolled up onto my windshield, and then ran off... leaving behind a decent amount of blood, his right shoe, and the $300 worth of Sudafed he had just stolen from CVS (this was just before they started carrying it behind the counter).

The cops caught him a few minutes later. Turns out you don't run so fast with only one shoe and multiple lacerations. All the damage was to the side of my dad's car, and there was plenty of footage of his flight from the pharmacy, so I was immediately cleared of wrongdoing. And that day I learned what a "tweaker" was.
 


Heimkehr

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I had my first accident at 17, driving my dad's car, on 38th St. in Indianapolis. I was proceeding through a left-turn arrow when a scruffy old redneck ran into my right fender, rolled up onto my windshield, and then ran off... leaving behind a decent amount of blood, his right shoe, and the $300 worth of Sudafed he had just stolen from CVS (this was just before they started carrying it behind the counter).
Now that antidiarrheals are migrating behind the counter, expect the next tweaker that runs into your vehicle to drop several boxes of Imodium A-D.
 

Asuriyan

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Now that antidiarrheals are migrating behind the counter, expect the next tweaker that runs into your vehicle to drop several boxes of Imodium A-D.
One small detail that I forgot to mention: the cops at the scene threw the Sudafed in my backseat before the car was towed away, and it was still there when we got it back from the body shop. We didn’t have to buy any decongestant for several years.

I’m not sure that 20 boxes of Imodium would have gone to use. That stuff gets me so constipated, I’d rather just deal with the diarrhea.
 

Rusty Shovel

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Don't worry. I took care of that deer for you...

The deer NEARLY escaped my yard...missed it by THIS much!

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Chrysler Factory Warranty
 
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