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JL MADDOG

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Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s party. He is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn’t taste like alcohol at all. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

He forced himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!!

He sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all cleaned and pressed! He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: ‘Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian’

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, ‘Son. what happened last night?’

‘Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.’
Confused, he asked his son, ‘So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??’

His son replies, ‘Oh THAT… Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, ‘Leave me alone, I’m married!!’
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JL MADDOG

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A woman went to the emergency room with an unstoppable case of hiccups, where she was seen by a young new doctor. After about 3 minutes in the examination room, the doctor told her she was pregnant.

She burst out of the room and ran down the corridor screaming.

An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was; after listening to her story, he calmed her down and sat her in another room.

Then the doctor marched down the hallway to the first doctor's room.

"What wrong with you?" he demanded. This woman is 63 years old, she has two grown children and several grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?!!"

The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said:

"Does she still have the hiccups?"
 

Krondor

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Hello all. Hope today is good for you and yours. Just saying...dieting through the holidays SUCKS!!! This is the only day I truly crave a good pecan pie. But...can't do that this year.

Update in Dad...they took out the mass from his stomach. Haven't heard what it was but probably just fibrous stuff. He is recovering and have gotten photos of him today and he looks good.

Bad news...while the doc was in there, he thought he saw cancer on his liver and a few other organs. He took biopsies and sent them off. We will see in a few days what the results are.
:please:

Praying for good news with the results.
 

obwahn

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Hello all. Hope today is good for you and yours. Just saying...dieting through the holidays SUCKS!!! This is the only day I truly crave a good pecan pie. But...can't do that this year.

Update in Dad...they took out the mass from his stomach. Haven't heard what it was but probably just fibrous stuff. He is recovering and have gotten photos of him today and he looks good.

Bad news...while the doc was in there, he thought he saw cancer on his liver and a few other organs. He took biopsies and sent them off. We will see in a few days what the results are.
Hoping for the best for your dad.
 

Laststand

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Yeah, in the case of drywall, it looks kinda easy on the surface, yes? Just slap a board on the wall and drive in a few screws. In my experience it never quite works out that way due to the aforementioned framers not doing a great job (especially here in So. Cal.) Every time I've ever tried to hang board I've run in the dreaded "nothing is in-plane and/or this one stud is acting as a fulcrum." When I tried to hang the ceiling piece on this latest job I rushed it, and yep, a fulcrum stud in the middle and the board cracked when screwed down. Then I said "okay, take some time (2 days) and properly prepare the area." Everything went in without a hitch after that.

Then, of course, there's the whole taping/mudding process which requires even greater skill(s).

And yeah, not even doing the roofing thing!
FuckThat.gif
Yep, it's the taping, mudding and wall prep I hate. I tend to be to much of a perfectionist, start playing around with it too much and then have to start over when I should have left good enough alone (especially the finish coats).

With you on the framing - not sure if anyone knows how to use a square or level anymore - have to really feel for the finish carpenter, floor, wall finish and cabinet folks since they have to make it all work in the end to look right.
 

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gek

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I blamed not being able to hear the motor. :CWL:

Was too low in rpm at the time. :facepalm:
Not being able to hear the engine is why one of the first things I did was put on some louder, but not annoying exhaust.
 

SABLE RHINO

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Screw tradition…Time to get the Detroit Lions off Thanksgiving day. Long over due 0-9-1.
Both teams suck and the game, though close, is boring. There should be 4 games AFC North v South East v West NFC North v South East v West champs from the prior season. The games would be much better and actually mean something...
 

Steveo

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Yep, it's the taping, mudding and wall prep I hate. I tend to be to much of a perfectionist, start playing around with it too much and then have to start over when I should have left good enough alone (especially the finish coats).
Yup, I'm the same way. One of the reason it takes me 10x longer than a normal human being. :CWL:

Like, I just finished this a few minutes ago. It'll work, but I'm not happy with it. That's the second piece I cut. These f'in screw guns are a PITA to use as well. It gets exponentially more difficult to drive the screw successfully the longer the screw is. :swear::swear:

but I have to keep telling myself "it'll be fine once it's taped and mudded."

Jeep Wrangler JL Jeep humor waiting room ( ** NO POLITICS ** ) 20211125_122535
 
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Krondor

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Yup, I'm the same way. One of the reason it takes me 10x longer than a normal human being. :CWL:

Like, I just finished this a few minutes ago. It'll work, but I'm not happy with it. That's the second piece I cut. These f'in screw guns are a PITA to use as well. It gets exponentially more difficult to drive the screw successfully the longer the screw is. :swear::swear:

but I have to keep telling myself "it'll be fine once it's mudded and taped."

Jeep Wrangler JL Jeep humor waiting room ( ** NO POLITICS ** ) steveo

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Krondor

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You guys may/may not ‘get’ this one, but had to share it…

Jeep Wrangler JL Jeep humor waiting room ( ** NO POLITICS ** ) sleeping on the couch.JPG


Cheers,
-CM-
I've only been out there one time, but I came away with a few memories.

Lots of chickens, and the spam wrapped in seaweed. There is a love of spam out there.
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